By Richard Feloni,
Personal branding through social media may help you build your professional network, but there will never be a replacement for a charismatic personality.
Napoleon Hill, author of "Think and Grow Rich" — one of the top-selling books of all time — wrote about the habits of the most likable people in his essay "Develop A Pleasing Personality," published in the forthcoming collection "The Science of Success."
He introduced his steps to having a "million-dollar personality" by explaining it was steel magnate Charles M. Schwab's charming demeanor that in the late 19th century elevated him from day laborer to an executive with a $75,000 salary and a frequent million-dollar bonus (astronomical numbers for the time).
Schwab's boss, the legendary industrialist Andrew Carnegie said "the yearly salary was for the work Schwab performed, but the bonus was for what Schwab, with his pleasing personality, could get others to do," Hill writes.
Here are Hill's 14 habits of people who are so likable that others go out of their way to help them:
It's often easier to give into cynicism, but those who choose to be positive set themselves up for success and have better reputations.
The best communicators speak deliberately and confidently, which gives their voice a pleasing sound.
Using a conversation as an opportunity to lecture someone "may feed the ego, but it never attracts people or makes friends," Hill says.
An overreaction to something either positive or negative can give people a poor impression. In the latter case, says Hill, "Remember that silence may be much more effective than your angry words."
"Remember that proper timing of your words and acts may give you a big advantage over impatient people," Hill writes.
Those who close themselves off from certain ideas and associate only with like-minded people are missing out on not only personal growth but also opportunities for advancing their careers.
Hill says that president Franklin D. Roosevelt's greatest asset was his "million-dollar smile," which allowed people to lower their guards during conversation.
The most likable people know that it's not worth offending people by expressing all their thoughts, even if they happen to be true.
Procrastination communicates to people that you're afraid of taking action, Hill says, and are therefore ineffective.
The best networkers help other people out without expecting anything in return.
People admire those who grow from failure rather than wallow in it. "Express your gratitude for having gained a measure of wisdom, which would not have come without defeat," Hill says.
The most likable people use conversations as an opportunity to learn about another person and give them time to talk.
"Praise the good traits of others, but don't rub it on where it is not deserved or spread it too thickly," Hill says.
Successful people don't pretend to be likable; they are likable because they care about their conduct and reputation. Having a confidant who can be completely honest with them allows them to continue growing.